Developing Self Awareness: 4 ways to build incredible self confidence
True confidence comes from knowing who you are—strengths, weaknesses, quirks, and all. And that, my friend, starts with developing self awareness!
Confession: I’ve always detested the advice of, “Fake it til you make it” for building confidence.
I know: it’s not totally bad advice; sometimes we gotta pretend in order to survive.
I deeply get that.
But, pretending to be something you're not doesn't build real confidence. Instead, it’s like putting on a paper crown; it might look the part but it won't survive the rain.
Why Developing Self Awareness is the Secret Sauce for Confidence
Let’s be clear: developing self awareness isn’t about navel-gazing or having an existential crisis every Tuesday. It’s about understanding what makes you tick, why you react the way you do, and how you impact others. When you’re in tune with yourself, you’re better-equipped to handle life’s curveballs - without spiraling into a stress puddle.
In fact, research by the Harvard Business Review found that self-awareness is the most important trait for leaders—even more critical than IQ or technical skills. Leaders who are self aware build stronger teams, make better decisions, and are more likely to be trusted by their employees. And guess what? This applies everywhere, not just at work.
The Connection Between Self-Awareness and Success
Self-awareness is foundational to emotional intelligence (EQ) - your ability to understand and manage your emotions while navigating relationships effectively. On average, people with high EQ earn $29,000 more annually than those with low EQ.
So, if you’re serious about crushing it at work and in life, developing self awareness isn’t optional—it’s essential.
Beyond the paycheck, developing self awareness helps you:
Make better decisions: When you know your triggers and biases, you’re less likely to let emotions cloud your judgment.
Communicate effectively: Understanding your own communication style makes it easier to adapt to others, avoiding unnecessary drama.
Strengthen relationships: Self-aware individuals are more empathetic, which leads to stronger connections both personally and professionally.
How to Develop Self Awareness (Without Meditating on a Mountain for 3 Years)
Ready to become the self awareness baddie you were born to be? Here are some fun and actionable ways to get started:
1. Take a Personality Test
Who doesn’t love a good personality quiz? Whether it’s the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI), the Enneagram (my favorite), or even a free one like 16Personalities, these tools can provide insights into your traits and tendencies that dominate your communication and decision making.
2. Reflect on Your Wins and Losses
Or, “wins and learns” as I like to call it. After significant events - or even weekly - take a few minutes to dissect what happened. What did you do well? What could you have done differently? What resources or people would have been helpful? Self-reflection turns experiences into lessons. Over time, patterns will emerge, revealing what triggers you and why. Leaders who engage in regular self-reflection are 30% more effective at navigating complex situations.
3. Ask for Feedback
This one’s not for the faint of heart, but it’s pure gold. Ask trusted friends, family, or colleagues to share how they perceive you. It might surprise you or leave you feeling vulnerable, but it’s invaluable for identifying blind spots.
4. Set Your Vision & Goals, and Track Your Progress
Set small, achievable goals that align with your vision and values. Track your progress and shift your approach to checking those boxes as you go. This helps you stay grounded and understand what truly motivates you.
The Fun Side of Developing Self Awareness
Here’s the thing about developing self awareness: it’s not just a tool for serious personal growth. It’s also a way to laugh at yourself and embrace your quirks. Did you spill coffee on yourself twice this week? Maybe you’re not a morning person—and that’s okay. Self awareness lets you own your moments, flaws and all, and that’s where real confidence is born.
“Developing self-awareness isn’t a one-and-done deal, though. It’s a career-and-life-long journey that evolves as you do”.
And, the payoff is massive. When you truly know yourself, you’re not just faking confidence—you’re living it. So ditch the “fake it til you make it” mantra and start building a foundation of self-awareness that weathers…well, the weather! Your future self will thank you.
